Ahem.
---
I have a few things to say before I start the rest of my speech:
In the way of our theme: At the beginning of this year there were ten people at the graduation committee meeting. In theory, committees are supposed to get things done, and our first task was to find a graduation theme. It is my experience that the third graduating class of DaVinci Academy is full of goofballs, so it was little surprise to no one that the first theme the ten of us agreed on was “tits and beer.” This theme had a range of applications, and would’ve allowed for someone jumping out of a cake, and act as an icebreaker leading to interesting conversation. As you may have noticed- this is not our theme. Additionally, this underground theme was presented again as “titsu um beerum,” to give it a more latin-official-important sounding name. It was again turned down. Probably to the relief of our parents, I’m sure.
Our current theme is about sacrifice, sacrificing who we are for who we will become – we even have pens that say it now.
In the way of the awards: Wow. I got two of them.
Stirling Miller and I had a college math class together this year, and as terrible as this makes me sound, I’d spend some time in class thinking about, “well, if he pulls an A- in this class all four quarters, I could be valedictorian.” So I cultivated my inner terrible person by plotting against him. This was before I knew that the school only counted the first semester of senior year toward class rank. All that time I spent being slightly competitive, and I should’ve been thinking, “if only he gets a B first semester.” Just kidding. Congratulations, Stirling, I know you, and Bonnie worked pretty hard. That takes a lot of dedication.
When I realized Jackson and I had been voted in as “The DaVincians” my initial reaction was, “They really do like me!” And that was exciting because for awhile I thought I’d driven you all away with my micromanagement techniques, my mood swings, and how clingy and emotional I can be. So thank you for looking past my defects long enough to see who I can’t see sometimes, the completely awesome person that I really am.
Speech-y time:
In seventh grade, Mrs. Kidd was my Utah history and social studies teacher. And because I tend to keep everything, I have a few things I’m going to show you. Most of you probably can’t see from here, but
(1) this is my bookcover from my textbook for that year, (2) this is the disclosure statement she gave for second quarter, outlining her required presentations and the project-based learning she wanted a bunch of junior high students to complete, as you can see, I turned in the portion that needed to be signed, (3) these are some notes I took for the final project in that class – a scrapbook timeline starting at 4.6 billion years ago, and (4) this is a picture of me receiving this award for excellence in history – even as a seventh grader, I was an overachiever. Let me be frank, being salutatorian feels pretty good.
Mrs. Kidd was not re-hired for the next year, and during the last few weeks of my seventh grade school year, she found DaVinci. The next year, I applied at DaVinci, and cried when they called and told me I had been accepted.
Junior high had been pretty difficult for me. I do not know what causes the separation and stereotypical social categorization that happens between elementary school and middle school, but in short, I was one of those awkward kids that spent lunch not eating, and watching other students play Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh card games. However, to be honest, even before junior high, I had very few good friends, those that I had moved away, and I was one of the kids that got picked on, not excessively, but enough. By ninth grade, I was carrying around mild depression, and was extremely self-conscious about my weight and seeming inadequacies for quite a few years. At certain points, it felt like I didn’t belong anywhere, and I had distanced myself from even my family. And that is how I came to be here.
DaVinci offered me a place to (1) start over, and (2) be myself, whoever that person might be. It’s been an adventure every day, and while that self-conscious teenager from Roy Jr. High sometimes still exists, I am an overall more confident person than I was four years ago. Probably happier, more responsible, I can only hope more grown up, and what I’ve noticed in the last year or so, I am able to be a part of my family again, which increasingly becomes more important to me. I don’t really know what the education part of it is playing, but I know that the people I have met while at DaVinci have contributed greatly to this transformation.
When I become the next Jesus- Ghandi -Obama, I want you all to know that it was you who helped me become great.
Let’s see. So far, I have found confidence, and the knowledge that I am really as awesome as I am… the only thing is for someone to give me a lot of money -
I spent more time at DaVinci Academy than I did in my own room. I belonged to the old time radio club, the gaming club, the world religion club a.k.a. the atheist club a.k.a. agnostics anonymous for Bible Club President Sydney Simonson, I participated in the accredidation committees, spent the last two years with the Parent-Teacher-Student-Organization, helped student council when they asked, spent countless hours with Megan to try and motivate and improve student body morale- you’ve all heard of “Speak: It’s your right.” “Change: It Happens” and “You: There’s only one.”, right? - worked for three and a half years on literary magazines, ran the anime club, tried to start poetry slams, put flagstone in the front of the building as part of my Girl Scout Gold Award, picked aluminum out of the trash cans, tried to start Free Hug Campaigns... But someone did not tell me that the kind of activities colleges look for are not necessarily school ones – if I had really wanted a lot of money, I should have spent my time out in the community, at adoption drives, at homeless shelters, helping elderly women cross the street. But I can’t help it if the community that I belong to is DaVinci.
Thankfully, the University of Utah recognized how cool I am, and how much money they really wanted to give me. So in the fall, I’m going to be in the honors program at the U of U, figuring out what I’m going to do with my life. Mrs. Kidd likes to tell me on occasion that they haven’t yet invented the job field I’m going to go into. Has anyone ever heard of a job where you get to wear a pikachu costume, do community service and care a lot about other people? It sounds kind of like prison, but yeah, I haven’t either.
A few weeks ago when my good friend Jackson and I were heading to a play about Mormons and aliens, we realized a few things:
DaVinci has a cycle- every few years it seems like it has to prove to itself that it can mess up something good, like letting go of important teachers, or instating a dress code, or having extreme financial difficulties, or booking the wrong Jon Stewart and having the Amy Stuart reporters out there give us bad press. The class of 2009 has debatably survived and overcome the majority of these difficulties.
Jackson and I had a theory. This DaVinci cycle is a conspiracy. It is a conspiracy cooked up by the school administration, the board, and the Ogden community to put a group of kids in a situation where they will have to survive specific and challenging conditions, that seem cruel, unusual, and inconsiderate to who we are as people. This is to breed a group of individuals that are socially aware and active, and will help with the revitalization of the Ogden community locally, and allow them to go forth into the broader global community to be social agents of change.
“What a self-serving scheme!” I thought to myself. Little do the conspirators know that this system will backfire on them, should they remain as uncaring and inhumane as they have been in the past.
We are not emotionless lab rats to test your social experiments on.
But because of this, the class of 2009 will be able to do exactly that, if they so choose, go out and be contributing members of society, able to overcome social and political obstacles wherever they arise. Because of this, we are strong. I guess the administration’s goal was achieved, although, on some occasions we will be exactingly bitter and cynical on the matter.
In a far away land known as the Kanto region, a ten-year-old boy left his home in the town of Pallet to pursue his dream of becoming a Pokemon Master. It is not easy for him, but eventually he becomes one of the most recognized Pokemon Trainers… in the ninth season, Battle Frontier. Not many people know this about Ash Ketchum, and they immediately assume that he is just a child from a children’s television show, where his character amounts to nothing in the real world. But considering that he left home at a young age, travels thousands of miles with his closest friends, lives on his own, wins and loses depending on his own skill, gets attacked on a daily basis, maintains his integrity when faced with “evil,” and still amounts to something great in his own world, I think he is overly underestimated.
For the last four years, I have grown up with a collection of Ash Ketchums, my graduating class. While none of you, to my knowledge, have a best friend named Pikachu, and you don’t go around challenging everyone in the area to a Pokemon battle, you have all had your struggles- you’ve made friends, lost friends, overcome social circumstances, political circumstances, left something at a young age emotionally or physically, and on a daily basis are underestimated by yourselves, your peers, or society as a whole. But I hope you never consider your situation hopeless, and your struggles fruitless, because one day, perseverance is going to pay off for all of you, because not one of you is un-great. When you’re offered a position in the Battle Frontier, and turn them down because you know your journey toward self-awareness isn’t over, I will not be surprised. But, I will be proud to have known you. Congratulations, class of 2009. Many good vibes and love. xoxoxo.
Friday, May 29, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Graduation Party
Alright.
So.
...
Things that have gotten done:
Mr. Burton is cooking breakfast Thursday morning.
Megan is working on the techno music play list for the rave room.
Movies have been decided- School of Rock, Wayne's World, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.
(Does Mrs. Taylor own these? Does Mr. Stohel own any of these? If not, will rent.)
Things that are being planned:
Getting consoles and rockband sets for that night. (Tom Orr, Derek Dugan, Jackson Carter, Claire Heman)
Need a Wii (2?) and SuperSmash Brothers for gamer's room.
Playlist of music videos- Tuesday after school, Burton's room, laptop, itunes
Things that still need to happen:
So.
...
Things that have gotten done:
Mr. Burton is cooking breakfast Thursday morning.
Megan is working on the techno music play list for the rave room.
Movies have been decided- School of Rock, Wayne's World, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.
(Does Mrs. Taylor own these? Does Mr. Stohel own any of these? If not, will rent.)
Things that are being planned:
Getting consoles and rockband sets for that night. (Tom Orr, Derek Dugan, Jackson Carter, Claire Heman)
Need a Wii (2?) and SuperSmash Brothers for gamer's room.
Playlist of music videos- Tuesday after school, Burton's room, laptop, itunes
Things that still need to happen:
Food!!
Glowsticks for rave room.
Water balloons?
We need some games. Let's do Apples to Apples. Cards. Imagineiff.
Senior movie room- What movies? Preferably ones that people already own. Anyone own Spinal Tap or The Wall?
My brain is a little dysfunctional right now. Hahaha.
So if I've forgotten something.
...
For the water fight:
We'll use the blue plastic pool, filled with water, water balloons.
We'll fit that in, 11:30-12:30.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Friday, May 22, 2009
This is not important. Compare and contrast.
Just re-living somethings.
High school has been on a pretty high horse.
Maybe some emotional catharsis needs to take place.
: )
ALSO: Pay attention to the dates.
---
[ No Subject ]
Sunday, December 17, 2006 1:38 PM
To: Claire
From: Jenna
hey.
how have ya been? long time no ... uh... email. i guess thats how you would phrase that. anyways... sorry about when you stopped by and i coulndt answer the door, dad was home and both he and mom would have made both of our lived hell. im really sorry.
so what have you been up to? anything fun? i havent, ive been so stressed out that i havent had time for anything. and my 'friend' justin is the source of that stress. plus, dont be mad like every one else, he got me smoking so ive been runnign around with my head cut off all week and smoking up a storm. ive had two packs easy in this last week. ans the most ive had prior this week was like five cigarettes.
thats how fuckin stressed i am.
i talked to ryan a while ago and he was sliggin some bull shit about me shunnig you? i personally, you knowing how retared i am, havent the slightest clue whats going on. i know i havent talked to you in a while but thats becasue ive been so busy running around being emo that i havent really talked to anyone but sarah and justin (the prick). please, if you would, email me or somthing os i can get teh jist of whats going on so i can fix what ever ive done to you. be warned though, aparently ive been doing shit to a bunch of people, and i have the slightest clue as to what ive done, so im a little pissed at the world, and a llittle extra emo.
so please talk to me so i can correct one friendship and hopefully regain alittle bit of my normal life i once had.
peace out little sis
love ya
jenn
---
[SUBJECT] claire does this mean you hate me?
Thursday, July 28, 2005 8:28 PM
To: Claire
From: Ryan
claire you havent replied to me does this mean you hate me im sorry to bother your life i guess ill leave your life and make it all better again you have your freinds and i dont have mine if you really feel like i should leave and stay out of your life i will and i read your online diary it seems you dont want me around so i though of a few slow ways to kill myself good bye
p.s these are how i will die 1.knee slashing 2. drinking acid 3.remmembering you dont want me around 4.when you blocked me 5.hanging 6.stabing 7.suicide 8.breaking legs and arms 9.knowing you hate me 10. im sorry i ruined your life and i will be ran over by a shreader........im sorry i ruineed your heart good bye unlees you contact me before 10 daysare up
---
RE:
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 4/19/05 1:57 PM
claire im sorry to hurt you i didnt know you felt like that and im sorry
RE:
From: Claire
To: Ryan
That all you have to say?
Really?
You don't know that it hurts me? When you care about someone, in this case me caring about you, you'd do anything not to see them hurt.
Think about it.
Claire
RE:
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Wed 6/08/05 4:48 PM
claire im sorry
---
[SUBJECT] ......i miss you
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 7/26/05 4:41 PM
claire.... i havent been eating well or thinking much or even msned much please reply if you dont reply in 30 minutes once you read this i know you wont be around and i know i will go kill myself please remmeber i said these things
please claire i will not eat or sleep untill i can speak to you again
---
(I forgot about this one... He was such a dork.)
[SUBJECT] did you mean it when you told me you loved me?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Wed 9/14/05 7:34 PM
im going to ask you one question. if you had to forget 1 person who would it be me or jenna if not im going back to my former name.
p.s my name is not ryan my real name is link.
sincearly link. formally known as ryan.
---
(A comment on an online journal entry)
Their reply was:
Subject: me (Ryan)
i cant belive you i did try to change for you but no you have to get all sad when i try to spend time with you geez claire if you dont want me to change the im going to kill my self sorry for trying to change for you!!!
---
[SUBJECT] im so sorry i dont know what i was thinking
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Wed 10/19/05 4:08 PM
im so sorry claire i didnt mean to put you through it all *crying* please forgive me for all the wrong iv done p.please claire your the only one who ever cared.. but i realize now im an ideot now you will never speak to me or have contact with me ever again just please read the rest im am sorry please claire this is the truth if you forgive me please remember i will stop the bull **** im so sorry please forgive me
love ryan
---
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Date: Fri, 28 Apr 2006
im sorry okay i might have been a little high when i started the convo i didnt mean to hurt you ok im sorry
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Thu, 27 Apr 2006
Right.
[SUBJECT] what is your problem?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Fri 4/28/06 2:51 PM
holy claire whats your problem?! i tried to tell you that im sorry but you cant understand that i love you but since you wont accept my apoligy you will alwaysthink that way no onder you kep spazing on me just accept it or move on you wont hear from me again if you dont feel like trusting me again!
ryan
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Fri, 28 Apr 2006
Dammit. Why don't you understand I will always trust you?! Like a moth to flame. Yeah. Okay. I'm sorry that right now, I'm an emotional wreck and wished someone were actually HERE to take a little pressure of.
Oh yes.
So very sorry.
[SUBJECT] RE: what is your problem?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Fri 4/28/06 7:17 PM
you just dont get it iv been getting mind fucked by so many people right now my eemotions are set to angry you think you need pressure off? i do! i am the one so still you want to be friends? fine i will be but i cant love you anymore i love some one else iv had to move on when its over and you decide to smarten up maybye just naybye it might go back to how it was...
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Date: Sat, 29 Apr 2006
i hate when you wont let go o matter how hard i try you cant let me out your so nice to me *sites back* you just wont seem to let me out of your site will you?
ryan
---
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: about the game yesterday
Date: Tue, 30 May 2006
well now that youve had some time to look for good fighting pictures we will have a good battle next time.
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Mon, 29 May 2006
You mean I was supposed to be searching? XD
Can't I just lose?
RE: about the game yesterday
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 5/30/06 12:50 PM
no you need to try and win thats the point people wouldent pick on you if you had more confadanse
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Tue, 30 May 2006
Who said anything about confidence? Perhaps I just like to lose.
RE: about the game yesterday
From:Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 5/30/06 3:56 PM
you better try agenst me next time! i like a challenge try agenst me!
---
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: Finally
Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2007
took you long enough to break it off with me, and now that i know you hate me, i don't feel so bad about you dumping me, sorry it had to end this way, and im sorry if you feel like shit afterwards and want to come back to me, sorry for all the shit iv'e caused to, so what ever, good bye Claire, i love you, always will , until i die, and maybe even longer, hope i see you in heaven...
[SUBJECT] RE: Finally
From: Claire
Sent: Sat 10/13/07 9:50 PM
To: Ryan
What the hell is your problem?
I'm sitting here thinking of all the things I want to say to you.
And how you're always fucking messing with me.
And how even if I said I left, I didn't really.
Because you'll always be holding me back.
Sometimes, I sit here and think, wow if only you really understood how things stand.
If only you understood what was really going on.
You know why I care?
Because I love you.
Even though I have friends who will be there for me, just like I'll be there for them.
Even though I know that they'll support me whether I'm a fucking maniac or angry or sad or depressed or if I drop out of school and become a freakin' hobo. Or am a lazy ass who will just live in their basement.
They're going to be there for me.
You, one of the people I always -want- to be there for me?
The one I want to take things seriously, and spell it out like it is, and make it so everything is so clear.
You're always gonna mess me up.
And hey, I've handled it for three years already.
What's a lifetime?
You're just being dumb.
That's what you're being.
You're too scared. Too scared.
Can't take it. If you can't take it, tell me already?
Okay?
Anyway,
I don't believe in heaven.
If this is any telling sign.
Maybe you can call me when you grow up?
Until then.
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: RE: Finally
Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2007
Hey Fuck You! you think i don't get it? You don't get it! you dumb fuck, i never liked you! the only reason i hooked up with you And let you come crawling back to me is to hook up and make you cyber, but fuck i guess that didn't work due to speaking with a fuckin emo kid hwo i never really liked, and Also, i don't give half a fuck about you or even if you do kill your self, i don't give a shit if you llove me and i also don't give a shit about how you feel rigt now.. I've grown up already, Maybe you should!, stop being a fucking clingy bitch and Don't reply to this, go fuckin cry yourself to sleep and hoping ill come back, because i never will, good fuckin riddence to a low life peice of fuckin shit Get the fuck outa my face, yoru wasting my fucking time
[SUBJECT] RE: Finally
From: Claire
Sent:
Sat 10/13/07 9:56 PM
To: Ryan
I smiled.
You're trying too hard.
[SUBJECT] On Blockage
From: Claire
Sent:
Mon 10/15/07 4:40 PM
To: Ryan
Eat more protein.
Protein regulates shit through your system faster and easier, lessening your chances of getting infected.
Maybe it will improve shitty attitudes, too?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: RE: On Blockage
Date: Thu, 18 Oct 2007
stop sending me fuckin Emails! and maybe...just maybe eating more protein will improove your shitty face
[SUBJECT] RE: On Blockage
From: Claire
Sent:
Wed 10/17/07 9:36 PM
To: Ryan
I can see through your perfect smile
He likes to read books written for girls
Prides himself on being a man of the world
It’s in the darkest places he gets his thrills
He will disappoint you, if you see through his perfect smile
I think separation is ok
You’re no star to guide me anyway
You only wanted me to play the fool
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: RE: On Blockage
Date: Thu, 18 Oct 2007
stop sending me emails YOU DUMB EMO BITCH!!!!
[SUBJECT] RE: On Blockage
From: Claire
Sent:
Wed 10/17/07 9:57 PM
To: Ryan
After almost three years, you couldn't be more original? Find something that would actually hurt?
The silence on this end is nonexistant. I'm laughing.
---
[SUBJECT] Random Story
From: Claire
Sent: Fri 11/09/07 8:30 PM
To: Ryan
I thought that maybe I would tell a story this time. Song lyrics do get kind of boring, but I do have two years and seven months worth to use on you. Not like I'm going to run out anytime soon.
This will sound cliche, but I'm reading this book called "Love, Stargirl" - it's a sequel of "Stargirl."
And I know what you're saying/thinking, "God, you're so fucking lame." Or "That even sounds dumb, like you *lame laugh*."
It's cool. I just bought it last night, I'm about fifty pages in, not very far, and I'm like, "Why the hell does this remind me of you?" Then I laugh at myself for being a moron.
But I keep wondering... You probably know what it's like.
Random story from this week:
My friends and I were on the bus yesterday morning (because we ride the public transit to school, 'cause we're cool like that), and someone said "Pokemon" in reference to me, because they're crazy like that. My friend Justin and I just randomly started singing "P-o-k-e-m-o-n." Everyone kind of went silent, and they were like, "that was a little creepy how you both sang that together."
It's because people are in tune with me like that.
Just because I'm shallow.
Don't you like how I keep bugging you?
Keep putting myself out there to get hit by you again?
I hate to be a pest, but try something better this time, okay?
P.S.
I decided some lyrics would be fitting:
"Every memory of looking out the back door
I have a photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
its hard to say it,
it's time to say it
Goodbye goodbye"
I wonder if your late-recent obsession with that song was a sign, or something?
: )
Hope you're well.
---
There is a lot of self-derisive laughter right now.
Oh my god, I was a MESS.
Hahahah.
Okay, still am.
It's wierd. I do kind of miss him.
I mean, this February was... the beginning of year five.
: )
- I hope this was good for me in order to write that speech.
Getting in the time frame, if you know.
High school has been on a pretty high horse.
Maybe some emotional catharsis needs to take place.
: )
ALSO: Pay attention to the dates.
---
[ No Subject ]
Sunday, December 17, 2006 1:38 PM
To: Claire
From: Jenna
hey.
how have ya been? long time no ... uh... email. i guess thats how you would phrase that. anyways... sorry about when you stopped by and i coulndt answer the door, dad was home and both he and mom would have made both of our lived hell. im really sorry.
so what have you been up to? anything fun? i havent, ive been so stressed out that i havent had time for anything. and my 'friend' justin is the source of that stress. plus, dont be mad like every one else, he got me smoking so ive been runnign around with my head cut off all week and smoking up a storm. ive had two packs easy in this last week. ans the most ive had prior this week was like five cigarettes.
thats how fuckin stressed i am.
i talked to ryan a while ago and he was sliggin some bull shit about me shunnig you? i personally, you knowing how retared i am, havent the slightest clue whats going on. i know i havent talked to you in a while but thats becasue ive been so busy running around being emo that i havent really talked to anyone but sarah and justin (the prick). please, if you would, email me or somthing os i can get teh jist of whats going on so i can fix what ever ive done to you. be warned though, aparently ive been doing shit to a bunch of people, and i have the slightest clue as to what ive done, so im a little pissed at the world, and a llittle extra emo.
so please talk to me so i can correct one friendship and hopefully regain alittle bit of my normal life i once had.
peace out little sis
love ya
jenn
---
[SUBJECT] claire does this mean you hate me?
Thursday, July 28, 2005 8:28 PM
To: Claire
From: Ryan
claire you havent replied to me does this mean you hate me im sorry to bother your life i guess ill leave your life and make it all better again you have your freinds and i dont have mine if you really feel like i should leave and stay out of your life i will and i read your online diary it seems you dont want me around so i though of a few slow ways to kill myself good bye
p.s these are how i will die 1.knee slashing 2. drinking acid 3.remmembering you dont want me around 4.when you blocked me 5.hanging 6.stabing 7.suicide 8.breaking legs and arms 9.knowing you hate me 10. im sorry i ruined your life and i will be ran over by a shreader........im sorry i ruineed your heart good bye unlees you contact me before 10 daysare up
---
RE:
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 4/19/05 1:57 PM
claire im sorry to hurt you i didnt know you felt like that and im sorry
RE:
From: Claire
To: Ryan
That all you have to say?
Really?
You don't know that it hurts me? When you care about someone, in this case me caring about you, you'd do anything not to see them hurt.
Think about it.
Claire
RE:
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Wed 6/08/05 4:48 PM
claire im sorry
---
[SUBJECT] ......i miss you
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 7/26/05 4:41 PM
claire.... i havent been eating well or thinking much or even msned much please reply if you dont reply in 30 minutes once you read this i know you wont be around and i know i will go kill myself please remmeber i said these things
please claire i will not eat or sleep untill i can speak to you again
---
(I forgot about this one... He was such a dork.)
[SUBJECT] did you mean it when you told me you loved me?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Wed 9/14/05 7:34 PM
im going to ask you one question. if you had to forget 1 person who would it be me or jenna if not im going back to my former name.
p.s my name is not ryan my real name is link.
sincearly link. formally known as ryan.
---
(A comment on an online journal entry)
Their reply was:
Subject: me (Ryan)
i cant belive you i did try to change for you but no you have to get all sad when i try to spend time with you geez claire if you dont want me to change the im going to kill my self sorry for trying to change for you!!!
---
[SUBJECT] im so sorry i dont know what i was thinking
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Wed 10/19/05 4:08 PM
im so sorry claire i didnt mean to put you through it all *crying* please forgive me for all the wrong iv done p.please claire your the only one who ever cared.. but i realize now im an ideot now you will never speak to me or have contact with me ever again just please read the rest im am sorry please claire this is the truth if you forgive me please remember i will stop the bull **** im so sorry please forgive me
love ryan
---
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Date: Fri, 28 Apr 2006
im sorry okay i might have been a little high when i started the convo i didnt mean to hurt you ok im sorry
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Thu, 27 Apr 2006
Right.
[SUBJECT] what is your problem?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Fri 4/28/06 2:51 PM
holy claire whats your problem?! i tried to tell you that im sorry but you cant understand that i love you but since you wont accept my apoligy you will alwaysthink that way no onder you kep spazing on me just accept it or move on you wont hear from me again if you dont feel like trusting me again!
ryan
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Fri, 28 Apr 2006
Dammit. Why don't you understand I will always trust you?! Like a moth to flame. Yeah. Okay. I'm sorry that right now, I'm an emotional wreck and wished someone were actually HERE to take a little pressure of.
Oh yes.
So very sorry.
[SUBJECT] RE: what is your problem?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Fri 4/28/06 7:17 PM
you just dont get it iv been getting mind fucked by so many people right now my eemotions are set to angry you think you need pressure off? i do! i am the one so still you want to be friends? fine i will be but i cant love you anymore i love some one else iv had to move on when its over and you decide to smarten up maybye just naybye it might go back to how it was...
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Date: Sat, 29 Apr 2006
i hate when you wont let go o matter how hard i try you cant let me out your so nice to me *sites back* you just wont seem to let me out of your site will you?
ryan
---
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: about the game yesterday
Date: Tue, 30 May 2006
well now that youve had some time to look for good fighting pictures we will have a good battle next time.
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Mon, 29 May 2006
You mean I was supposed to be searching? XD
Can't I just lose?
RE: about the game yesterday
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 5/30/06 12:50 PM
no you need to try and win thats the point people wouldent pick on you if you had more confadanse
From: Claire
To: Ryan
Date: Tue, 30 May 2006
Who said anything about confidence? Perhaps I just like to lose.
RE: about the game yesterday
From:Ryan
To: Claire
Sent:
Tue 5/30/06 3:56 PM
you better try agenst me next time! i like a challenge try agenst me!
---
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: Finally
Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2007
took you long enough to break it off with me, and now that i know you hate me, i don't feel so bad about you dumping me, sorry it had to end this way, and im sorry if you feel like shit afterwards and want to come back to me, sorry for all the shit iv'e caused to, so what ever, good bye Claire, i love you, always will , until i die, and maybe even longer, hope i see you in heaven...
[SUBJECT] RE: Finally
From: Claire
Sent: Sat 10/13/07 9:50 PM
To: Ryan
What the hell is your problem?
I'm sitting here thinking of all the things I want to say to you.
And how you're always fucking messing with me.
And how even if I said I left, I didn't really.
Because you'll always be holding me back.
Sometimes, I sit here and think, wow if only you really understood how things stand.
If only you understood what was really going on.
You know why I care?
Because I love you.
Even though I have friends who will be there for me, just like I'll be there for them.
Even though I know that they'll support me whether I'm a fucking maniac or angry or sad or depressed or if I drop out of school and become a freakin' hobo. Or am a lazy ass who will just live in their basement.
They're going to be there for me.
You, one of the people I always -want- to be there for me?
The one I want to take things seriously, and spell it out like it is, and make it so everything is so clear.
You're always gonna mess me up.
And hey, I've handled it for three years already.
What's a lifetime?
You're just being dumb.
That's what you're being.
You're too scared. Too scared.
Can't take it. If you can't take it, tell me already?
Okay?
Anyway,
I don't believe in heaven.
If this is any telling sign.
Maybe you can call me when you grow up?
Until then.
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: RE: Finally
Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2007
Hey Fuck You! you think i don't get it? You don't get it! you dumb fuck, i never liked you! the only reason i hooked up with you And let you come crawling back to me is to hook up and make you cyber, but fuck i guess that didn't work due to speaking with a fuckin emo kid hwo i never really liked, and Also, i don't give half a fuck about you or even if you do kill your self, i don't give a shit if you llove me and i also don't give a shit about how you feel rigt now.. I've grown up already, Maybe you should!, stop being a fucking clingy bitch and Don't reply to this, go fuckin cry yourself to sleep and hoping ill come back, because i never will, good fuckin riddence to a low life peice of fuckin shit Get the fuck outa my face, yoru wasting my fucking time
[SUBJECT] RE: Finally
From: Claire
Sent:
Sat 10/13/07 9:56 PM
To: Ryan
I smiled.
You're trying too hard.
[SUBJECT] On Blockage
From: Claire
Sent:
Mon 10/15/07 4:40 PM
To: Ryan
Eat more protein.
Protein regulates shit through your system faster and easier, lessening your chances of getting infected.
Maybe it will improve shitty attitudes, too?
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: RE: On Blockage
Date: Thu, 18 Oct 2007
stop sending me fuckin Emails! and maybe...just maybe eating more protein will improove your shitty face
[SUBJECT] RE: On Blockage
From: Claire
Sent:
Wed 10/17/07 9:36 PM
To: Ryan
I can see through your perfect smile
He likes to read books written for girls
Prides himself on being a man of the world
It’s in the darkest places he gets his thrills
He will disappoint you, if you see through his perfect smile
I think separation is ok
You’re no star to guide me anyway
You only wanted me to play the fool
From: Ryan
To: Claire
Subject: RE: On Blockage
Date: Thu, 18 Oct 2007
stop sending me emails YOU DUMB EMO BITCH!!!!
[SUBJECT] RE: On Blockage
From: Claire
Sent:
Wed 10/17/07 9:57 PM
To: Ryan
After almost three years, you couldn't be more original? Find something that would actually hurt?
The silence on this end is nonexistant. I'm laughing.
---
[SUBJECT] Random Story
From: Claire
Sent: Fri 11/09/07 8:30 PM
To: Ryan
I thought that maybe I would tell a story this time. Song lyrics do get kind of boring, but I do have two years and seven months worth to use on you. Not like I'm going to run out anytime soon.
This will sound cliche, but I'm reading this book called "Love, Stargirl" - it's a sequel of "Stargirl."
And I know what you're saying/thinking, "God, you're so fucking lame." Or "That even sounds dumb, like you *lame laugh*."
It's cool. I just bought it last night, I'm about fifty pages in, not very far, and I'm like, "Why the hell does this remind me of you?" Then I laugh at myself for being a moron.
But I keep wondering... You probably know what it's like.
Random story from this week:
My friends and I were on the bus yesterday morning (because we ride the public transit to school, 'cause we're cool like that), and someone said "Pokemon" in reference to me, because they're crazy like that. My friend Justin and I just randomly started singing "P-o-k-e-m-o-n." Everyone kind of went silent, and they were like, "that was a little creepy how you both sang that together."
It's because people are in tune with me like that.
Just because I'm shallow.
Don't you like how I keep bugging you?
Keep putting myself out there to get hit by you again?
I hate to be a pest, but try something better this time, okay?
P.S.
I decided some lyrics would be fitting:
"Every memory of looking out the back door
I have a photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
its hard to say it,
it's time to say it
Goodbye goodbye"
I wonder if your late-recent obsession with that song was a sign, or something?
: )
Hope you're well.
---
There is a lot of self-derisive laughter right now.
Oh my god, I was a MESS.
Hahahah.
Okay, still am.
It's wierd. I do kind of miss him.
I mean, this February was... the beginning of year five.
: )
- I hope this was good for me in order to write that speech.
Getting in the time frame, if you know.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
I AM TIRED
I am tired.
I'll do a quick list of all the things that circulate every second of every day:
I didn't write my graduation speech. Which is due tomorrow.
I need to rescend invites to my graduation barbeque because my father forgot to include the date on the first ones.
I have my 1060 final tomorrow. If I fail, it goes on my permanent record. So will the A-.
Fixing the sprinklers in the flagstone.
Finalizing the graduation party.
Having money for the graduation party.
Selling graduation party tickets.
Having enough graduation tickets.
Cleaning my room.
Having all my crap organized before my family flies in.
Worrying about how much time I will be able to spend with said family.
Checking out of highschool.
Being replaced.
The end of the year.
The negativity of my peers in general.
Fuuuuuuuuuck.
I'll do a quick list of all the things that circulate every second of every day:
I didn't write my graduation speech. Which is due tomorrow.
I need to rescend invites to my graduation barbeque because my father forgot to include the date on the first ones.
I have my 1060 final tomorrow. If I fail, it goes on my permanent record. So will the A-.
Fixing the sprinklers in the flagstone.
Finalizing the graduation party.
Having money for the graduation party.
Selling graduation party tickets.
Having enough graduation tickets.
Cleaning my room.
Having all my crap organized before my family flies in.
Worrying about how much time I will be able to spend with said family.
Checking out of highschool.
Being replaced.
The end of the year.
The negativity of my peers in general.
Fuuuuuuuuuck.
Monday, May 18, 2009
A note to self:
Dear BFF,
I think that I will write you a letter. In the kind of backstabbing poetic prose that I usually strike with. But it will be honest, and encapsulate my feelings.
And I hope that in a few days, I will give it to you.
(Along with my graduation speech about us.)
Perhaps my intentions are purely selfish, but I don't think you understand how much it hurts to see you with other people - laughing more, hanging more, talking more, experiencing more life than we do together.
I know you said something about talking to me makes you confront your own problems, and in order to avoid them, you avoid me in turn.
I guess that just makes me easier to replace. Someone who doesn't make you feel good can't possibly be good, right?
I think I still love you.
(Which probably makes this that much more difficult.)
But I'm striving for honesty, and that closure you always get, but I always run from.
Love,
Claire
I think that I will write you a letter. In the kind of backstabbing poetic prose that I usually strike with. But it will be honest, and encapsulate my feelings.
And I hope that in a few days, I will give it to you.
(Along with my graduation speech about us.)
Perhaps my intentions are purely selfish, but I don't think you understand how much it hurts to see you with other people - laughing more, hanging more, talking more, experiencing more life than we do together.
I know you said something about talking to me makes you confront your own problems, and in order to avoid them, you avoid me in turn.
I guess that just makes me easier to replace. Someone who doesn't make you feel good can't possibly be good, right?
I think I still love you.
(Which probably makes this that much more difficult.)
But I'm striving for honesty, and that closure you always get, but I always run from.
Love,
Claire
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Conversations through the Intrawebz
So I recently sent a private message to a friend of mine (who I met online three years ago)- I know, shady, right? We haven't talked for awhile, mostly because... I'm broken? Hahaha.
Anyway, here is our correspondence thus far:
From: RainbowJimmy
To: (----)
Posted: Sat May 16, 2009 8:01 pm
Subject: Hey, Torri.
I know. Long time no type, right?
Anyway, I'm sending my grad. announcements out on Monday, and I was wondering if you still wanted one (I understand if you don't). If you do, I need your address.
Uhm.
I'm not good at playing catch up, especially if I failed at communicating again.
Let me know how you're doing, alright?
I'll just do a quick"ie" for now.
I graduate in ... seven days? Whoa. Jesus, I shouldn't've counted. I should be freaking out right now.
Anyway, I'm salutatorian, and my senior class voted me DaVincian (that's an in-school award, where it's like, "do you represent the blah blah blah of the school, have you supported the school and your class, are you ridiculously active, and etc."). At Prom I won Prom King.
So, honestly, I probably should feel like I'm the most fucking awesome kid at school.
A week before prom, I got in trouble with my school's administration, and important people who I've looked up to, and who have kind of been my mentors for the last four years really disappointed me in respect to why I got in trouble. And really, I wasn't in trouble. I did everything completely right, I didn't even break any rules. I was just trying to educate the student body. But I was treated like a criminal by them. ... So there's that. Hahaha. So now I'm a "criminal."
I don't. Ha.
I feel whiny. And bitchy.
And all around, you know that empty feeling you get in your abdomen, like you're hungry, but it's just an emotional manifestation of your feelings? Yeah. That. Constantly.
My list of things to do is pretty horrendously long, as well. I still need to write my speech for graduation... *sigh*
Plus, passing my classes still.
But everyday I'm around, I feel more cynical and bitter.
I never thought highschool would end that way, for me.
I got full-tuition honors to the University of Utah...
Other than that, I'm the same mess of emotions I've always been.
I hope you're doing awesome.
Let me know.
: D
Love,
Jimmy
---
From: (----)
To: RainbowJimmy
Posted: Sun May 17, 2009 9:05 pm
Subject: Re: Hey, Torri.
Wow, you make me feel like I was a retard when I was in school. I never accomplished anything like that. D: I'm so proud of you, dear! Seriously.
I would still love a graduation announcement to put on my fridge.
My address is:
(---)
I was surprised to even hear from you.
We don't talk like we used to
You know, when we were walking the 10 miles to and from school uphill in the snow.
---
From: Rainbowjimmy
To: (----)
Posted: Sun May 17, 2009 9:38 pm
Subject: Re: Hey, Torri.
Well, I hope it was a pleasant surprise?
: D
And it's mostly my fault that we haven't been talking, I'm guessing.
I feel like I've been running for a long time.
How are you? How have you been?
---
I'm tired.
And I have to come clean about how I'm not really a boy. How many times has this happened to me in my life so far?
Three.
Because that's how awesome I really am.
Anyway, here is our correspondence thus far:
From: RainbowJimmy
To: (----)
Posted: Sat May 16, 2009 8:01 pm
Subject: Hey, Torri.
I know. Long time no type, right?
Anyway, I'm sending my grad. announcements out on Monday, and I was wondering if you still wanted one (I understand if you don't). If you do, I need your address.
Uhm.
I'm not good at playing catch up, especially if I failed at communicating again.
Let me know how you're doing, alright?
I'll just do a quick"ie" for now.
I graduate in ... seven days? Whoa. Jesus, I shouldn't've counted. I should be freaking out right now.
Anyway, I'm salutatorian, and my senior class voted me DaVincian (that's an in-school award, where it's like, "do you represent the blah blah blah of the school, have you supported the school and your class, are you ridiculously active, and etc."). At Prom I won Prom King.
So, honestly, I probably should feel like I'm the most fucking awesome kid at school.
A week before prom, I got in trouble with my school's administration, and important people who I've looked up to, and who have kind of been my mentors for the last four years really disappointed me in respect to why I got in trouble. And really, I wasn't in trouble. I did everything completely right, I didn't even break any rules. I was just trying to educate the student body. But I was treated like a criminal by them. ... So there's that. Hahaha. So now I'm a "criminal."
I don't. Ha.
I feel whiny. And bitchy.
And all around, you know that empty feeling you get in your abdomen, like you're hungry, but it's just an emotional manifestation of your feelings? Yeah. That. Constantly.
My list of things to do is pretty horrendously long, as well. I still need to write my speech for graduation... *sigh*
Plus, passing my classes still.
But everyday I'm around, I feel more cynical and bitter.
I never thought highschool would end that way, for me.
I got full-tuition honors to the University of Utah...
Other than that, I'm the same mess of emotions I've always been.
I hope you're doing awesome.
Let me know.
: D
Love,
Jimmy
---
From: (----)
To: RainbowJimmy
Posted: Sun May 17, 2009 9:05 pm
Subject: Re: Hey, Torri.
Wow, you make me feel like I was a retard when I was in school. I never accomplished anything like that. D: I'm so proud of you, dear! Seriously.
I would still love a graduation announcement to put on my fridge.
My address is:
(---)
I was surprised to even hear from you.
We don't talk like we used to
You know, when we were walking the 10 miles to and from school uphill in the snow.
---
From: Rainbowjimmy
To: (----)
Posted: Sun May 17, 2009 9:38 pm
Subject: Re: Hey, Torri.
Well, I hope it was a pleasant surprise?
: D
And it's mostly my fault that we haven't been talking, I'm guessing.
I feel like I've been running for a long time.
How are you? How have you been?
---
I'm tired.
And I have to come clean about how I'm not really a boy. How many times has this happened to me in my life so far?
Three.
Because that's how awesome I really am.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
The Candle of Service
This Thursday I'm being inducted into the National Honors Society.
It may seem silly because it's two weeks before I graduate from high school that I'm finally getting in. But I mean, taken with the fact that the local chapter just started, and I'm one of the first members of the society...
Anyway. Not to sound conceited (I might as well brag somewhere like this blog that no one reads, haha). But I'll be the most "decorated" senior in my graduating class. That's pretty cool. I feel pretty cool, actually.
So the induction is a pretty formal ceremony, apparently. And so the seven or so new members all have lines, and things they have to do within this ceremony. Apparently, there is this candle of knowledge, which lights all the other candles. My candle is "service." Ian signed me up for that candle... ( <_<; ) But there are other candles like the candle of "scholarship."
How quaint.
He was really pushing for me to be the candle of knowledge, but I guess the candle of knowledge is used to light all the other candles, and not be lit. Hahaha.
Knowledge is everlasting?
The great can fall just as easily from wisdom, I'm sure.
There's a barbeque afterward, too. I'm sure my dad and my brother will be totally psyched for that part of this excursion. I'm glad my family is supportive.
: D
Hopefully we get our Honors Society sashes at this induction. That'll be exciting to wear on my graduation gown.
---
On another note, the graduation program looks pretty awesome. Kudos to Mrs. Taylor.
On Monday, graduation party tickets go on sale.
And I need to count up all the people I need tickets for. Heh. That'll be exciting.
It may seem silly because it's two weeks before I graduate from high school that I'm finally getting in. But I mean, taken with the fact that the local chapter just started, and I'm one of the first members of the society...
So the induction is a pretty formal ceremony, apparently. And so the seven or so new members all have lines, and things they have to do within this ceremony. Apparently, there is this candle of knowledge, which lights all the other candles. My candle is "service." Ian signed me up for that candle... ( <_<; ) But there are other candles like the candle of "scholarship."
How quaint.
He was really pushing for me to be the candle of knowledge, but I guess the candle of knowledge is used to light all the other candles, and not be lit. Hahaha.
Knowledge is everlasting?
The great can fall just as easily from wisdom, I'm sure.
There's a barbeque afterward, too. I'm sure my dad and my brother will be totally psyched for that part of this excursion. I'm glad my family is supportive.
: D
Hopefully we get our Honors Society sashes at this induction. That'll be exciting to wear on my graduation gown.
---
On another note, the graduation program looks pretty awesome. Kudos to Mrs. Taylor.
On Monday, graduation party tickets go on sale.
And I need to count up all the people I need tickets for. Heh. That'll be exciting.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Graduation Party? - Mrs.Taylor
Start time: 10:30 pm - May 27th
End time: 7:30 am - May 28th
GENERAL
Food-
(*) Graduation cookies
(*) Veggie/fruit trays
(*) Pretzels
(*) Edamame
(*) Pizza
(*) Chips
Drinks-
(*) Applebeer
(*) Rootbear
(*) Lemonade
(*) Water
Movies-
(*) School of Rock
(*) ???
Suggestions: Across the Universe, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, Empire Records, A Knight's Tale, Wayne's World -- Maybe three movies?
Boardgames-
(*) Cards
(*) Apples-to-Apples
(*) Imagine Iff
(*) Life
(*) Phase 10
Suggestions: open
TV Games-
(*) Rockband
(*) Guitar Hero
(*) DDR
(*) Karaoke (?)
Note: Will need to find all of this equipment from students, etc
---
TIMELINE
10:30-11:30
Centrifuge (?) or Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
11:30-12:30
Centrifuge (?) or Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
Senior movie room
Cardboard guitars
12:30-1:30
Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
TV games
Senior movie room
Cardboard guitars
1:30-2:30
Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
TV games
Senior movie room
Rave (w/glow in the dark bracelets)
2:30-3:30
Karaoke (?) or Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
Senior movie room
Rave (w/glow in the dark bracelets)
3:30-4:30
Movie #1
Food
Sleep area
Senior movie room
4:30-5:30
Movie #2
Food
Sleep area
Senior movie room
5:30-6:30
(end movie time)
Boardgames
Sleep area
Senior movie room
6:30-7:30
Centrifuge (?) or Metal Music Videos
Breakfast
---
ABOUT
Metal Music Videos - Derek Dugan, David Amsel, and Ricky Ableman are in charge of finding a bunch of viable music videos for this. This will be played on a few white sheets on the stage in the commons.
Moshpit - In the area in front of the stage, will be outlined by the backs of couches. Smaller area.
Cardboard Guitars - The guitars that we ordered can be decorated in the cafeteria. Need decoration supplies. Stickers, markers, foam shapes.
Centrifuge - The Heinz brother band may decide to play. They will play off to the side of the stage, probably left, or on the stage. If they play. They are interested in doing a couple 10-minute sets, with two songs a set, for a total of ten songs.
Boardgames - Tables set up on the right hand of the stage, and back and around. Probably with plastic table clothes (black?)
TV Games - Set up in Mrs. Larsen's room. We'll use the tables in there for the boardgame/food tables. Probably three tvs?
Rave - In Crivello's room. Blacklights (Megan and Brandi). Strobe lights (Brandi). Techno music. Bottlecap candy (?). We can sell glow sticks, and glow in the dark bracelets/bracelet maker bags for this.
Senior Movie Room - Will be a room, probably Mr. Stohel's. With movies that only seniors can watch. In order to get into this room, you'll need a "over 21" bracelet (bracelets we give to the seniors). Playlist for this room will need to be decided.
Breakfast - Suggested that we ask Mr. Burton to do breakfast for us.
End time: 7:30 am - May 28th
GENERAL
Food-
(*) Graduation cookies
(*) Veggie/fruit trays
(*) Pretzels
(*) Edamame
(*) Pizza
(*) Chips
Drinks-
(*) Applebeer
(*) Rootbear
(*) Lemonade
(*) Water
Movies-
(*) School of Rock
(*) ???
Suggestions: Across the Universe, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, Empire Records, A Knight's Tale, Wayne's World -- Maybe three movies?
Boardgames-
(*) Cards
(*) Apples-to-Apples
(*) Imagine Iff
(*) Life
(*) Phase 10
Suggestions: open
TV Games-
(*) Rockband
(*) Guitar Hero
(*) DDR
(*) Karaoke (?)
Note: Will need to find all of this equipment from students, etc
---
TIMELINE
10:30-11:30
Centrifuge (?) or Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
11:30-12:30
Centrifuge (?) or Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
Senior movie room
Cardboard guitars
12:30-1:30
Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
TV games
Senior movie room
Cardboard guitars
1:30-2:30
Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
TV games
Senior movie room
Rave (w/glow in the dark bracelets)
2:30-3:30
Karaoke (?) or Metal Music Videos
Food
Boardgames
Moshpit
Senior movie room
Rave (w/glow in the dark bracelets)
3:30-4:30
Movie #1
Food
Sleep area
Senior movie room
4:30-5:30
Movie #2
Food
Sleep area
Senior movie room
5:30-6:30
(end movie time)
Boardgames
Sleep area
Senior movie room
6:30-7:30
Centrifuge (?) or Metal Music Videos
Breakfast
---
ABOUT
Metal Music Videos - Derek Dugan, David Amsel, and Ricky Ableman are in charge of finding a bunch of viable music videos for this. This will be played on a few white sheets on the stage in the commons.
Moshpit - In the area in front of the stage, will be outlined by the backs of couches. Smaller area.
Cardboard Guitars - The guitars that we ordered can be decorated in the cafeteria. Need decoration supplies. Stickers, markers, foam shapes.
Centrifuge - The Heinz brother band may decide to play. They will play off to the side of the stage, probably left, or on the stage. If they play. They are interested in doing a couple 10-minute sets, with two songs a set, for a total of ten songs.
Boardgames - Tables set up on the right hand of the stage, and back and around. Probably with plastic table clothes (black?)
TV Games - Set up in Mrs. Larsen's room. We'll use the tables in there for the boardgame/food tables. Probably three tvs?
Rave - In Crivello's room. Blacklights (Megan and Brandi). Strobe lights (Brandi). Techno music. Bottlecap candy (?). We can sell glow sticks, and glow in the dark bracelets/bracelet maker bags for this.
Senior Movie Room - Will be a room, probably Mr. Stohel's. With movies that only seniors can watch. In order to get into this room, you'll need a "over 21" bracelet (bracelets we give to the seniors). Playlist for this room will need to be decided.
Breakfast - Suggested that we ask Mr. Burton to do breakfast for us.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
This is the proving point.
So I just took the "Political Compass" test, and, of course, I was correct all along.
I am very similar to Jesus.Or perhaps in this case, Ghandi or Nelson Mandela.
My father's family has a lot of internal issues, and several sibblings don't really get along. I'm graduating in a few weeks, and I'm sending out invitations, which will also include an invitation to a graduation barbeque (which is an idea we've stolen from several graduates on my dad's side of the family - my cousin Josh, and my step-cousins Josh and Jordan). And a LOT of family is coming for that. My parents were trying to assure me my uncle will go to this barbeque, even though my aunts and uncles on the east coast that he doesn't really like are flying out for my graduation as well, because he loves me he'll still attend, and just suck it up. I was not entirely convinced (because my uncle John will do whatever the hell he wants), however, I had an epiphany -
"What if I'm the Obama of the family?!"
Which is, agian, just another reinforcement of the idea that I am indeed the "agent of change" or the Jesus, or the Ghandi. Look out, world. You and I are going places, and the universe is watching the entire thing.
I suggest Chalisa take this, just because I'll be entertained by her reaction to her result, and all her stories she'll tell after taking it.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Thank you, Megan. [Also, also]
Don Henley lyrics to utter for every occasion:
-Some of these are slightly doctored for ease of use in conversation.
"All you want to do is dance, dance, dance."
(All She Wants to do is Dance)
"Well, I coulda been an actor, but I wound up here."
"Kick you when you're up, kick you when you're down."
"Just leave well enough alone, eat your dirty laundry."
"Dirty little secrets, dirty little lies."
"I'd love to cut you down to size."
"Give me dirty laundry."
(Dirty Laundry)
"I lost me, and you lost you."
"The more I know, the less I understand."
"I think it's about forgiveness."
"I got a call today, that I didn't want to hear, but I knew it would come."
"I'm learning to live without you now."
"The more I know, the less I understand."
(Forgiveness - The Heart of the Matter)
"I won't give up so easy."
"Who do you think I am?"
"I'm gonna tear it up." "We're gonna tear it up."
"I will not go quietly."
"I will not lie down."
(I Will Not Go Quietly)
"I've been a lot of places, I've seen a lot of things."
"I was flying back from Lubbock, and I saw Jesus on the plane, or maybe it was Elvis. You know, they kinda look the same."
"If dirt were dollars, I wouldn't worry anymore."
"Now, baby, have you got no shame?"
"This brave new world gone bad again."
"These days the buck stops nowhere, no one takes the blame."
"Evil's still evil."
"If dirt were dollars, we'd all be in the black."
(If Dirt Were Dollars)
"In a New York minute."
"Everything can change."
"When happily ever after fails."
"We'll sit and watch the clouds roll by."
"This is the end of the innocence."
(The End of the Innocence)
"This is the last worthless evening that you'll ever have."
(The Last Worthless Evening)
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Mish-mosh.
Current Pandora Station: LFO (Pop)
My thoughts on Publications: I think that having a paper online, is one, the most economical and logical solution due to the fact that newspapers everywhere have declining sales in physical papers, and two, ridiculously technologically proactive.
So there's that.
I also am in love with the idea of a more interactive format for the student body instead of the marketing scheme that the main website (davinciacademy.org) is. There's that.
Part of the calendar should have like national holidays such as the "Day of Pi" or "National Story Telling Day" or "NANOWRIMO" or whatevs, like that. It's fun, potentially boosts morale, and creates awareness of something bigger than ourselves. It could have like a clickable excerpt with a paragraph explaining how the day came around, and the like.
Also, part two, I've been wanting to do something like an online blog, paper, etc. since eighth grade, so I am overall psyched for this project.
And I think that Ian, Megan and I should write the horoscopes.
: D
This Afternoon: My life is ruled by math homework, and studying for a trigonometry re-take, studying up on the novels we read in AP Lit for AP Lit test, and also has chemistry homework.
How much of it will I really do?
Probably AP Lit, and studying for trig. Heh. Let's be realistic.
But I really need to do AWESOME on the re-take for trig.
On Porn: I am not a fan, and in my experience, can be extremely derogatory and negative for the development of the human psyche. It is also a source of addiction. Plus, it makes me sick.
On Approval: Someone liked my stuff. And favorited five pieces, and commented on three. And then added me to their watch list. I feel like I should be awesome with it one day. Universe, give me the ability to be great.
freakishlywired.deviantart.com
On Friday: I had an impromptu meeting with Mrs. Kidd. Discussed how to bridge the gap that's formed between me and two of some prominent mentors/educators/respected people in my life. More and more, I think that it will be extremely difficult to ever get back to our easy banter the way it was before. And I'm unsure if I even want that. Do I still know them? And are they miserable due to their own actions or my own? We talked about how people have forgotten that if you really want to talk to Mrs. Kidd you just have to keep trying; yes, she is busy, and flighty, but if you really have something that needs to be said you can't just drop it in defeat.
There was also the discussion about dresscode, and she called herself out on how it hasn't really ever worked at all. And I will say to whoever is reading this, YOU CAN GET IT CHANGED, IF NOT REVOKED, IF YOU GO THROUGH ALL THE PROPER PROCEDURES. SEE YOUR STUDENT GOVERNMENT FOR AVAILABLE METHODS AND VEHICLES OF CHANGE.
There was also some other things that were said. But I don't know if I can talk about them (to anyone), they're far too personal to me. I probably won't tell my parents - Mrs. Kidd will have to say it to them. And also, if I find myself saying them outloud, there is the possibility of conceit and superior attitude being conveyed, and in some ways, I am far from that. But the truth is, perhaps I am really going to convey that - and feel it. I'd like to avoid that. I try not to flaunt my humanistic flaws.
One of the ways I'm seeking emotional vindication and closure is burning a CD (with the songs from the previous entry), and giving it to said individuals.
Current Pandora Station Now: Three Days Grace
On Jenna:
Dear you,
If she came back, and said that she wanted to sleep with me, would I be willing to sleep with her? Or would I be extremely emotionally tempted, but eventually use persevering logic to say no? In your situation, would I have been able to survive unlike you?
-Me
On Friday Library Discussions: Anyone seeking to hold a conversation, discuss something they're concerned about, need someone to talk to, the library is being opened as a safe zone for first amendment rights (as far as they carry in an educational system).
This friday and ever friday hereafter, in addition to the graduation party meeting, the library is available to students. Mrs. Kidd has decided, if not commited, to be available during this time also, so that you can speak to her about anything on your mind.
Overcome the desire to hide behind the idea that "you have nothing to say, right now" and help make the library a free forum!
On Rice: It's delicious.
On Prom 2009: I am officially Prom King 2oo9. I am pretty rockin'. I would like to make a statement about how open DaVinci is to challenging gender roles in our society. To attest to that is people's reaction to hearing that I won. Especially people outside of DaVinci's inner-workings.
This is proof that the dream still lives somewhere!
Plus, I got my hair cut Saturday afternoon. It's a change. I'm trying to change the universe's vibes for the positive.
On B&E: Right now it is 4:24 PM on Sunday. My mother just called (right now) to inform me that someone broke in one of the windows to our van, while it was parked at the Park & Ride at Saturn. As far as we know, there was no reason at all for it to occur, such as we had no valuables in the car. My mom sounded pretty shaken up, and I'm worried about her. Although, I have a feeling that my mother is more wordly than she acts in front of her children, but still, she's a sensitive soul. And I'm sorry that she has to deal with it all by herself. She called the police, and she's waiting for them to show up so she can give them a report.
But ironically, she was on her way to Costco from work (the Air National Guard base in Salt Lake) to pick up a fruit platter for Teacher Appreciation Week for the DaVinci teachers. Good deeds are surely rewarded by acts of human kindness, right?
Right.
Thank you, humanity.
"And no one ever tells you that forever feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head."
My thoughts on Publications: I think that having a paper online, is one, the most economical and logical solution due to the fact that newspapers everywhere have declining sales in physical papers, and two, ridiculously technologically proactive.
So there's that.
I also am in love with the idea of a more interactive format for the student body instead of the marketing scheme that the main website (davinciacademy.org) is. There's that.
Part of the calendar should have like national holidays such as the "Day of Pi" or "National Story Telling Day" or "NANOWRIMO" or whatevs, like that. It's fun, potentially boosts morale, and creates awareness of something bigger than ourselves. It could have like a clickable excerpt with a paragraph explaining how the day came around, and the like.
Also, part two, I've been wanting to do something like an online blog, paper, etc. since eighth grade, so I am overall psyched for this project.
And I think that Ian, Megan and I should write the horoscopes.
: D
This Afternoon: My life is ruled by math homework, and studying for a trigonometry re-take, studying up on the novels we read in AP Lit for AP Lit test, and also has chemistry homework.
How much of it will I really do?
Probably AP Lit, and studying for trig. Heh. Let's be realistic.
But I really need to do AWESOME on the re-take for trig.
On Porn: I am not a fan, and in my experience, can be extremely derogatory and negative for the development of the human psyche. It is also a source of addiction. Plus, it makes me sick.
On Approval: Someone liked my stuff. And favorited five pieces, and commented on three. And then added me to their watch list. I feel like I should be awesome with it one day. Universe, give me the ability to be great.
freakishlywired.deviantart.com
On Friday: I had an impromptu meeting with Mrs. Kidd. Discussed how to bridge the gap that's formed between me and two of some prominent mentors/educators/respected people in my life. More and more, I think that it will be extremely difficult to ever get back to our easy banter the way it was before. And I'm unsure if I even want that. Do I still know them? And are they miserable due to their own actions or my own? We talked about how people have forgotten that if you really want to talk to Mrs. Kidd you just have to keep trying; yes, she is busy, and flighty, but if you really have something that needs to be said you can't just drop it in defeat.
There was also the discussion about dresscode, and she called herself out on how it hasn't really ever worked at all. And I will say to whoever is reading this, YOU CAN GET IT CHANGED, IF NOT REVOKED, IF YOU GO THROUGH ALL THE PROPER PROCEDURES. SEE YOUR STUDENT GOVERNMENT FOR AVAILABLE METHODS AND VEHICLES OF CHANGE.
There was also some other things that were said. But I don't know if I can talk about them (to anyone), they're far too personal to me. I probably won't tell my parents - Mrs. Kidd will have to say it to them. And also, if I find myself saying them outloud, there is the possibility of conceit and superior attitude being conveyed, and in some ways, I am far from that. But the truth is, perhaps I am really going to convey that - and feel it. I'd like to avoid that. I try not to flaunt my humanistic flaws.
One of the ways I'm seeking emotional vindication and closure is burning a CD (with the songs from the previous entry), and giving it to said individuals.
Current Pandora Station Now: Three Days Grace
On Jenna:
Dear you,
If she came back, and said that she wanted to sleep with me, would I be willing to sleep with her? Or would I be extremely emotionally tempted, but eventually use persevering logic to say no? In your situation, would I have been able to survive unlike you?
-Me
On Friday Library Discussions: Anyone seeking to hold a conversation, discuss something they're concerned about, need someone to talk to, the library is being opened as a safe zone for first amendment rights (as far as they carry in an educational system).
This friday and ever friday hereafter, in addition to the graduation party meeting, the library is available to students. Mrs. Kidd has decided, if not commited, to be available during this time also, so that you can speak to her about anything on your mind.
Overcome the desire to hide behind the idea that "you have nothing to say, right now" and help make the library a free forum!
On Rice: It's delicious.
On Prom 2009: I am officially Prom King 2oo9. I am pretty rockin'. I would like to make a statement about how open DaVinci is to challenging gender roles in our society. To attest to that is people's reaction to hearing that I won. Especially people outside of DaVinci's inner-workings.
This is proof that the dream still lives somewhere!
Plus, I got my hair cut Saturday afternoon. It's a change. I'm trying to change the universe's vibes for the positive.
On B&E: Right now it is 4:24 PM on Sunday. My mother just called (right now) to inform me that someone broke in one of the windows to our van, while it was parked at the Park & Ride at Saturn. As far as we know, there was no reason at all for it to occur, such as we had no valuables in the car. My mom sounded pretty shaken up, and I'm worried about her. Although, I have a feeling that my mother is more wordly than she acts in front of her children, but still, she's a sensitive soul. And I'm sorry that she has to deal with it all by herself. She called the police, and she's waiting for them to show up so she can give them a report.
But ironically, she was on her way to Costco from work (the Air National Guard base in Salt Lake) to pick up a fruit platter for Teacher Appreciation Week for the DaVinci teachers. Good deeds are surely rewarded by acts of human kindness, right?
Right.
Thank you, humanity.
"And no one ever tells you that forever feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head."
Friday, May 1, 2009
Emotional Justice : A musical format
Pokemon Johto Theme
Happy Ever After - Letters to Cleo
Saint Simon - The Shins
The Saddest Song - Streetlight Manifesto
I'm Just a Kid - Simple Plan
Uncomfortable - Goldfinger
The Heart of the Matter - Don Henley
Revolution - Across the Universe
Concrete Girl - Switchfoot
The Victory Party - The Remus Lupins
Stars - Switchfoot
The Artist in the Ambulance - Thrice
Renegade - Cavalier King
Unlike Me - Katie Havok
The Unprotected - Cavalier King
A Walk Through Hell - Say Anything
Sleepwalking - Nana (Tribute)
What Kind of Pokemon Are You? - 2BA Master
Sugar Guitar - Nana (Tribute)
Wizard Wrock Twist - The Remus Lupins
Happy Ever After - Letters to Cleo
Saint Simon - The Shins
The Saddest Song - Streetlight Manifesto
I'm Just a Kid - Simple Plan
Uncomfortable - Goldfinger
The Heart of the Matter - Don Henley
Revolution - Across the Universe
Concrete Girl - Switchfoot
The Victory Party - The Remus Lupins
Stars - Switchfoot
The Artist in the Ambulance - Thrice
Renegade - Cavalier King
Unlike Me - Katie Havok
The Unprotected - Cavalier King
A Walk Through Hell - Say Anything
Sleepwalking - Nana (Tribute)
What Kind of Pokemon Are You? - 2BA Master
Sugar Guitar - Nana (Tribute)
Wizard Wrock Twist - The Remus Lupins
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
WAIT WAIT, DO TELL ME.
A few things.
1)
I will win. You can play the gender card all you want, but I am going to win. I will be prom queen. Because if you can play the gender card after having harbored a homosexual in your home (claiming it as cool points, later), and flirting with other girls consistently, you deserve to lose. And lose to me. I'm going to win because I am conceited enough to think that people like me better, and know that they do. And if you really wanted to make this a popularity contest, that's just what the fuck it'll be.
Also, just hearing what you'll say to me afterward. Priceless. I can't wait to hear the cliche bullshit you try to tell yourself, and your friends.
2)
I GOT ON THE PROCTORED TEST LIST.
I WILL GRADUATE, I WILL.
1)
I will win. You can play the gender card all you want, but I am going to win. I will be prom queen. Because if you can play the gender card after having harbored a homosexual in your home (claiming it as cool points, later), and flirting with other girls consistently, you deserve to lose. And lose to me. I'm going to win because I am conceited enough to think that people like me better, and know that they do. And if you really wanted to make this a popularity contest, that's just what the fuck it'll be.
Also, just hearing what you'll say to me afterward. Priceless. I can't wait to hear the cliche bullshit you try to tell yourself, and your friends.
2)
I GOT ON THE PROCTORED TEST LIST.
I WILL GRADUATE, I WILL.
Monday, April 27, 2009
A To-Do List?
A quick to-do list, I suppose.
... I think I'm going to bed early, and waking up early.
I wish that I could write until my fingers bled, and my heart stopped beating, because it would be more like feeling,
than right now,
where I just stare blankly at myself in the mirror, waiting to be beautiful.
Waiting to matter.
And that's where it goes downhill, because what I don't realize, is that I'm just as awesome as I say, just as awesome as I say I'm pretending to be.
But I wish I could feel.
- Review the synopses of Pride&Prejudice, The Portrait of Dorian Grey, A Doll's House, The Bluest Eye, Catcher in the Rye, Macbeth, and The Tempest via Sparknotes
- Work on scholarships (cry)
- Schedule overnight orientation for honors program at the U
- Sign up for housing at Fort Douglas
- Take tour of housing at Fort Douglas
- Do chemistry research on carbon dating
- Finish posters for seniors
- Find a way to weasle my way back into the literary magazine
- Draw some sketches of newspaper website
- 6.4, 6.5 for Trigonometry
- Memorize 60 trig functions by Thursday
- Learn how to do trig (cry)
- Get on proctored test list
- Take proctored Fin. Lit test (EXTREME CRY)
- Get senior pictures
- Talk to community member (epic fail)
- Call Andrew
- Talk to Mr. McFall
- Sell Pikachu hats
- Go shopping for Prom King outfit
- Turn in make-up workouts for ILA
... I think I'm going to bed early, and waking up early.
I wish that I could write until my fingers bled, and my heart stopped beating, because it would be more like feeling,
than right now,
where I just stare blankly at myself in the mirror, waiting to be beautiful.
Waiting to matter.
And that's where it goes downhill, because what I don't realize, is that I'm just as awesome as I say, just as awesome as I say I'm pretending to be.
But I wish I could feel.
How to deal with disappointment..
I actually don't know how to deal with it.
However, when you're honest with someone about your feelings, and what they may or may not have done to you personally, or something that you're working toward, and the next time you see them, they've taken the reigns of the project that you've been working together on for the fourth year in a row, what is this supposed to say?
That they also do not wish to talk to you for awhile?
That your character has forever been mawled by the happenings that caused the harsh feelings?
THAT because I am honest with you about my feelings, for the first time in for ever, I am suddenly not the person that I was before.
Fuck responsibilty, apparently. Fuck character development.
Dear you,
I can, apparently, do nothing right for you anymore.
That hurts.
Thanks for the update, however, on taking over the literary magazine.
I even saved it for you, from someone else.
The conferences, the staff members.
The ideals, the goals.
The focus groups.
All the years that we worked together, and suddenly, I'm not good enough to even help work on it.
Thanks.
Thank you very much.
I'm glad that you can take that away from me, too.
Not just my comfortability, and security in that I have a voice.
-Claire
PS You probably don't know who you are, if you will ever read this.
But it seems like everything I do these day is equivalent to, "thanks for the fuck, here's your money, now get out."
However, when you're honest with someone about your feelings, and what they may or may not have done to you personally, or something that you're working toward, and the next time you see them, they've taken the reigns of the project that you've been working together on for the fourth year in a row, what is this supposed to say?
That they also do not wish to talk to you for awhile?
That your character has forever been mawled by the happenings that caused the harsh feelings?
THAT because I am honest with you about my feelings, for the first time in for ever, I am suddenly not the person that I was before.
Fuck responsibilty, apparently. Fuck character development.
Dear you,
I can, apparently, do nothing right for you anymore.
That hurts.
Thanks for the update, however, on taking over the literary magazine.
I even saved it for you, from someone else.
The conferences, the staff members.
The ideals, the goals.
The focus groups.
All the years that we worked together, and suddenly, I'm not good enough to even help work on it.
Thanks.
Thank you very much.
I'm glad that you can take that away from me, too.
Not just my comfortability, and security in that I have a voice.
-Claire
PS You probably don't know who you are, if you will ever read this.
But it seems like everything I do these day is equivalent to, "thanks for the fuck, here's your money, now get out."
Things for seniors to remember... (college corner?)
With a month until graduation, seniors may be experiencing some crunch-time madness, and many have been suffering from senioritis for weeks, months and in extreme cases, years. In the last eighth of the year (also known as the bit of school left after fourth quarter midterms), grades, citizenship, and attendance can suffer.
Seniors should know, however, that they are on the home stretch- running toward home plate a million miles an hour, but the risk of striking out is great. Even failing your fourth quarter classes will keep a student from graduating.
The seniors have gone through thirteen years of an institution that has continually screwed them over, taken away their rights, and bored them with long lectures on "how to survive the real world" and "you better get that grade back up." Even the most focused feel the end approaching, as Stirling Miller has said on occasion, "I know I should do it [my homework] but every weekend I put it off." And although, this institution of education has been a harsh disciplinarian, some of them will be bereft due to its absence after May 27th.
Take some time out of your day to hug a senior.
Amidst all of the raging senioritis, there are some things the seniors need to remember:
First and foremost, do not forget to take the ACT or the SAT if you have not already done so.
Second, Mrs. Taylor, and Mrs. Kidd have some events planned for you. On April 28th, Mrs. Kidd is taking the seniors to the library to find a children's book that will be read by a group of seniors at the graduation ceremony. On May 20th, Mrs. Taylor is taking the seniors for a photo-op at Beus Pond, which will be accompanied by a pizza picnic. She also has a picture package for interested seniors (and their parents) to buy.
Third, seniors need to pick up their graduation tickets, and submit their school of choice (whether it be state university, technical college, or massage school), and their desired major.
Finally, the seniors should become aware of the events occurring on the last week of school - just so that they can be prepared, and for some, plan to skip accordingly.
Monday, May 25th - No school. Memorial Weekend.
Tuesday, May 26th - Senior check-out day, Senior barbecue, Yearbook stomp
Wednesday, May 27th - Juniors serve the seniors breakfast, practice graduation, 5:30 PM Seniors do a run-through of the ceremony at the Union Station, 7:00 PM the Graduation Ceremony, 10:30 PM All-Night Graduation Party.
Thursday, May 28th - Last day of school (Yearbook day)
Keep on running, seniors!
Seniors should know, however, that they are on the home stretch- running toward home plate a million miles an hour, but the risk of striking out is great. Even failing your fourth quarter classes will keep a student from graduating.
The seniors have gone through thirteen years of an institution that has continually screwed them over, taken away their rights, and bored them with long lectures on "how to survive the real world" and "you better get that grade back up." Even the most focused feel the end approaching, as Stirling Miller has said on occasion, "I know I should do it [my homework] but every weekend I put it off." And although, this institution of education has been a harsh disciplinarian, some of them will be bereft due to its absence after May 27th.
Take some time out of your day to hug a senior.
Amidst all of the raging senioritis, there are some things the seniors need to remember:
First and foremost, do not forget to take the ACT or the SAT if you have not already done so.
Second, Mrs. Taylor, and Mrs. Kidd have some events planned for you. On April 28th, Mrs. Kidd is taking the seniors to the library to find a children's book that will be read by a group of seniors at the graduation ceremony. On May 20th, Mrs. Taylor is taking the seniors for a photo-op at Beus Pond, which will be accompanied by a pizza picnic. She also has a picture package for interested seniors (and their parents) to buy.
Third, seniors need to pick up their graduation tickets, and submit their school of choice (whether it be state university, technical college, or massage school), and their desired major.
Finally, the seniors should become aware of the events occurring on the last week of school - just so that they can be prepared, and for some, plan to skip accordingly.
Monday, May 25th - No school. Memorial Weekend.
Tuesday, May 26th - Senior check-out day, Senior barbecue, Yearbook stomp
Wednesday, May 27th - Juniors serve the seniors breakfast, practice graduation, 5:30 PM Seniors do a run-through of the ceremony at the Union Station, 7:00 PM the Graduation Ceremony, 10:30 PM All-Night Graduation Party.
Thursday, May 28th - Last day of school (Yearbook day)
Keep on running, seniors!
Friday, April 24, 2009
Music Meme - Typing practice
((Put your music library on shuffle. Post the first lines of the first 25 songs that come up.))
Jenny, Jenny, who can I turn to? There are places I remember, all my life. At night I hear it creeping, at night I feel it move. Shot memory, and a fucked up mind, can't remember what I left behind. Dreamer. You know you are a dreamer. Well, can you put your hands in your head? I kept the right ones out, and let the wrong ones in. High above the mucky much, castle made of clouds, there sits Wonder Boy, sitting oh so proudly. What have I done? Where have I come from? It's been a long time. Restless tonight, 'cause I wasted the light, between both these times, I drew a really thin line. I am bottled, fizzy water, and you are shaking me up. She's not a girl who misses much. Everybody's talking to computers. Let the bodies hit the floor. We've got to win the war on drugs for the sake of our society. I'm just a normal boy who sank when I fell overboard. Hope dangles on a string, like slow spinning redemption. Met a girl, over the net, saved our chats on a floppy diskette. I'm tugging at my hair, I'm pulling at my clothes. Just hear me out, if it's not perfect, I'll perfect it until my heart explodes. Your heart's beating around the clock, time ticking away, it doesn't stop. I can't stand to fly, I'm not naive. This is my December, this is my time of the year. Now if you need me, call me. Finally, I figured out what took a long long time.
If you want to take a stab at guessing where all of these lines are from, you should know that each different song is marked by the bolded letter. Try not to depend on Google, he's a great guy and all, but I think that's a bit of cheating. Also, there is only one Pokemon song. So heh.
Jenny, Jenny, who can I turn to? There are places I remember, all my life. At night I hear it creeping, at night I feel it move. Shot memory, and a fucked up mind, can't remember what I left behind. Dreamer. You know you are a dreamer. Well, can you put your hands in your head? I kept the right ones out, and let the wrong ones in. High above the mucky much, castle made of clouds, there sits Wonder Boy, sitting oh so proudly. What have I done? Where have I come from? It's been a long time. Restless tonight, 'cause I wasted the light, between both these times, I drew a really thin line. I am bottled, fizzy water, and you are shaking me up. She's not a girl who misses much. Everybody's talking to computers. Let the bodies hit the floor. We've got to win the war on drugs for the sake of our society. I'm just a normal boy who sank when I fell overboard. Hope dangles on a string, like slow spinning redemption. Met a girl, over the net, saved our chats on a floppy diskette. I'm tugging at my hair, I'm pulling at my clothes. Just hear me out, if it's not perfect, I'll perfect it until my heart explodes. Your heart's beating around the clock, time ticking away, it doesn't stop. I can't stand to fly, I'm not naive. This is my December, this is my time of the year. Now if you need me, call me. Finally, I figured out what took a long long time.
If you want to take a stab at guessing where all of these lines are from, you should know that each different song is marked by the bolded letter. Try not to depend on Google, he's a great guy and all, but I think that's a bit of cheating. Also, there is only one Pokemon song. So heh.
ZOMG IN A BOX. (intro post for fails)
Okay.
So this is Claire, the all-around, intimidating senior on camp(us), chump news reporter, yearbook copy writer, Pokemon master.
I am a cancerous sheep, out with the electric triangles, waiting in the wings with my cartoon junkies and LIT floozies. I love me some vegetable tempura, non-shiitake, with the tempura sauce. But no, seriously.
I'm graduating this year. This is my first time with the paper, and the yearbook.
Every year I hear people say to me, "ZOMG, WE'RE SO NOT MEETING OUR DEADLINES AND THIS IS SO STRESSFUL SO I WILL BELITTLE YOUR WORK ON LITERARY MAGAZINE AND EVERYTHING ELSE YOU DO AT DAVINCI BECAUSE YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND MY YEARBOOK PAINZ." This is for you, publications burnouts. I don't understand your yearbook pains. I can write copy and make color boxes. And B.S. layout until my eyes fall out.
And I'm chief editor of the literary magazine. Suck it.
...Just kidding.
This is pretty unprofessional.
That's why it's an introduction.
Are you still here? Hang up and try your call, again.
In other news, the Suncrest Service Unit's Summer Carnival is now selling tickets. Do you have any younger sibblings who enjoy pointless carnival games? Do you enjoy pointless carnival games? Are you interested in girl scouts but not a girl scout?
I can hook you up.
(shameless plug)
In other other news, I need to get rid of girl scout cookies.
Anyway, I'm outz.
So this is Claire, the all-around, intimidating senior on camp(us), chump news reporter, yearbook copy writer, Pokemon master.
I am a cancerous sheep, out with the electric triangles, waiting in the wings with my cartoon junkies and LIT floozies. I love me some vegetable tempura, non-shiitake, with the tempura sauce. But no, seriously.
I'm graduating this year. This is my first time with the paper, and the yearbook.
Every year I hear people say to me, "ZOMG, WE'RE SO NOT MEETING OUR DEADLINES AND THIS IS SO STRESSFUL SO I WILL BELITTLE YOUR WORK ON LITERARY MAGAZINE AND EVERYTHING ELSE YOU DO AT DAVINCI BECAUSE YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND MY YEARBOOK PAINZ." This is for you, publications burnouts. I don't understand your yearbook pains. I can write copy and make color boxes. And B.S. layout until my eyes fall out.
And I'm chief editor of the literary magazine. Suck it.
...Just kidding.
This is pretty unprofessional.
That's why it's an introduction.
Are you still here? Hang up and try your call, again.
In other news, the Suncrest Service Unit's Summer Carnival is now selling tickets. Do you have any younger sibblings who enjoy pointless carnival games? Do you enjoy pointless carnival games? Are you interested in girl scouts but not a girl scout?
I can hook you up.
(shameless plug)
In other other news, I need to get rid of girl scout cookies.
Anyway, I'm outz.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
This is the lyrical representation of my proactive reaction to the administration and ensuing government:
... And maybe it isn't mature, or comprehensive. But get a clue.
Simple Plan - Shut Up
You'll never stop me
Nothing you say today
Is gonna bring me down
Is gonna bring me down
Will never bring me down
Don't tell me who I should be
And don't try to tell me what's right for me
Don't tell me what I should do
I don't wanna waste my time
I'll watch you fade away
Linkin Park - Meteora
I am what you never wanna say
but I've never had a doubt
It's like no matter what I do
I can't convince you for once just to hear me out
So I let go watching you
turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I've got
The Majestic Twelve - American Rage
I've listened to all of your nonsense
I've tried to make sense of it
It's left me broke and bleeding
Slow burn, American Rage
I take the hours they give me
My wife sleeps all alone
My son, he barely knows me
I am American Rage
My father sweat oil in a flat field
My mother taught children in school
We fought, and saved, and prayed
We bleed American Rage
I work every second I'm breathing
I'm on the clock every second I'm alive
But still I'm slowly sinking
I am American Rage
I'll be right behind you in your dreams, dear -
I'll be right behind you in your nightmare
Simple Plan - Shut Up
You'll never stop me
Nothing you say today
Is gonna bring me down
Is gonna bring me down
Will never bring me down
Don't tell me who I should be
And don't try to tell me what's right for me
Don't tell me what I should do
I don't wanna waste my time
I'll watch you fade away
Linkin Park - Meteora
I am what you never wanna say
but I've never had a doubt
It's like no matter what I do
I can't convince you for once just to hear me out
So I let go watching you
turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I've got
The Majestic Twelve - American Rage
I've listened to all of your nonsense
I've tried to make sense of it
It's left me broke and bleeding
Slow burn, American Rage
I take the hours they give me
My wife sleeps all alone
My son, he barely knows me
I am American Rage
My father sweat oil in a flat field
My mother taught children in school
We fought, and saved, and prayed
We bleed American Rage
I work every second I'm breathing
I'm on the clock every second I'm alive
But still I'm slowly sinking
I am American Rage
I'll be right behind you in your dreams, dear -
I'll be right behind you in your nightmare
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